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April 11, 2013updated 12 Apr 2013 5:17pm

Axegrinder: Misnomer in Doncaster…Fleet Street poem…Canadian libel by juxtaposition…Bexley letters page invaded by aliens

By Axegrinder

Misnomer put to bed in Doncaster

The Doncaster Free Press was first published in 1925 so you would think that by now all locals had cottoned on to the fact that, despite its title, they have to pay for it. It seems not (see picture above).

Canadian libel by juxtaposition?

Fleet Street Dehn poem reissued

This poem by former Fleet Street film critic Paul Dehn is from an entertaining collection called the Poets of Fleet Street.

First published in 1969 and edited by Ted Harriott and John Bull, it has been reissued by Chaplin Books:

Gutter Press
(News Editor)
Peer Confesses,
Bishop Undresses,
Torso wrapped in Rug,
Girl Guide Throttled,
Baronet Bottled,
J.P. Goes to Jug.
But yesterday’s story’s
Old and hoary.
Never mind who got hurt.
No use grieving,
Let’s get weaving.
What’s the latest dirt?
Diplomat Spotted,
Scout Garrotted,
Thigh Discovered In Bog,
Wrecks Off Barmouth,
Sex In Yarmouth
Woman In Love With Dog,
Eminent Hostess Shoots Her Guests,
Harrogate Lovebird Builds Two Nests.

Star letter, Bexley News Shopper?

Letters pages have long been seen by some as a way to get outrageous works of fiction into otherwise respectable local newspapers.

It’s a tradition which is still alive and well in south London judging by this recent letter of the week in the Bexley News Shopper (above).

It relates how a reader was approached by an alien in Danson Park who was “visiting the earth to hand out free orgasms".

“Shyly, she asked me if I would like one. I didn’t want to offend her by refusing.

“The Gray got to work and I swear the Earth moved on its axis.

“I thanked her and then revealed I was puzzled as my partner had been led to believe the female orgasm did not exist.”

Really, Bexley News Shopper – these people don’t need encouraging!

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