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October 9, 2013

Sunday Sport accuses Ralph Miliband of killing a kitten

By Axegrinder

Axegrinder thought newspapers might have been more careful when it came to writing about Ed Miliband’s father following the controversy involving the Daily Mail and Mail on Sunday.

But the Marxist academic now stands accused of slaughtering a kitten during a drunken rampage.

The Sunday Sport has an exclusive interview with Eunice Clark who claims Miliband snr ran over her kitten Winston while riding his bike in January 1944.

She told The Sunday Sport: “Winston was my only friend. One night he was late coming home so I went out to look for him. It was a freezing, foggy night but I saw him walking down the road, bold as brass.

“I shouted ‘Come here Winston!’ But at that moment, a young naval officer came pedalling down the road on his bike, singing in a language I now know to be Belgian. He was obviously steaming drunk.

“He barrelled into Winston squashing him flat, then carried on as if nothing had happened. I am convinced that man was Ralph Miliband. Only a Belgian – a Belgian Communist – could have killed a kitten in cold blood.”  

The newspaper reported that it was “unlikely” that Ed Miliband would be responding to the allegations.

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The death of little kittens can cause tremendous controversy. Irish national broadcaster RTE is in the firing line after a teenage boy machine-gunned a kitten on their hit crime-drama Love Hate. 

The show's creator Stuart Carolan was forced to defend his writing claiming that no one was going to go out and shoot a cat because they've watched the programme. 

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