NOW I have great admiration for newspaper sales staff. In my experience, the circulation boys have always been the closest at heart to editorial, the only other department that seemed to have just as much fun as we did on this daily helter-skelter.

They had great piss-ups, were capable of outrageous pranks and, being by nature hustlers and snake oil salesmen, were magnificent fixers. Once, when all avenues legal and illegal had been exhausted, I asked our newspaper sales manager if he could procure hospitality tickets to the Cheltenham Festival for me and three mates from back home. Within 24 hours there was a discreet envelope containing the tickets on my desk, no charge of course.