With the hopes and expectations of the nation resting on her shoulders, you have to feel a little sympathy for the Duchess of Cambridge.
A rumoured due date of 13 July means journalists have naturally been camped outside St Mary’s Hospital in Paddington since the beginning of the month. But with no joy so far.
Still, it’s okay for the newspapers, which can resort to quoting distant relatives and finding non-stories while knowing they'll be able to go big on the story the day after birth.
But Axegrinder feels sorry for the gossip magazines, which were hoping to fill this week’s editions with Royal baby news.
It’s not alone, but Hello! magazine this week made a clear attempt to fudge the fact it was published before the Royal baby’s arrival.
Its front page shows a happy Royal couple, William and Kate, cradling… a bunch of flowers on an unspecified date. It also promises an ‘A-Z OF THE BIRTH DETAILS’ and a ‘GLORIOUS FAMILY PHOTO ALBUM’.
In addition, the front page plugs a feature with Kate’s mum and sister: ‘CAROLE AND PIPPA CELEBRATE WITH THE QUEEN’.
A quick glance inside confirms Axegrinder’s suspicions: Hello! can’t really tell the future.
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