Axegrinder knows that as fellow journalists, none of you would be interested in the latest gossip involving one of our brethren.
In fact, I would be deeply saddened if any of you are still reading.
Today’s tale of woe involves Susanna Reid, who it seems has left former sports journalist Dominic Cotton.
Cotton logged onto a well-known dating website and uploaded a profile where he described himself as "separated"
The BBC Breakfast presenter has also decided that she’s had enough of traipsing up and down to Salford and is decamping to ITV.
The mother-of-three became a national treasure following her exploits on Strictly Come Dancing.
Axegrinder is informed it is a show that involves celebrities spinning around without the aid of ice or getting wet.
As regular readers will acknowledge, Axegrinder is a kindly soul. So if Susanna requires a shoulder to cry on, or some companionship, Axegrinder is only too happy to help. Unless it involves dancing.