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Fooled? Jeremy Clarkson joins The Guardian, trampolines in Tesco and Simon Cowell to appear on fivers

By Dominic Ponsford

April 1 is the one day of the year when journalists can legitimately make a story up in a cheap bid to grab readers' attention.

Here's a round-up of some not-true stories from the news today:

The Guardian reports that  disgraced Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson has become the latest celebrity to support its campaign for fossil fuel divestment.

Written by a reporter named Daisy Pofallor, it said the outspoken broadcaster "had new-found sympathy for environmental issues, interfaith dialogue, and intersectional feminism".

And they even mocked up a video of him touring The Guardian offices:

The Sun reports that Simon Cowell has agreed for his face to adorn a limited edition £5 note, dubbed a "Siver".

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The Telegraph has news of a welcome product designed to stop readers falling asleep while buried in a good book – the device reportedly going on sale today.

It says the boo!mark is an electronic device that monitors the reader's breathing and sounds a gentle alarm if they doze off.

The Daily Express joined forces with Tesco to hoodwink gullible readers with a story that the store would introduce trampolines in the aisles to help shorter customers reach the top shelf.

Quoting spokeswoman Daisy O'Farllop the store said it was a practical and fun way to help customers.

The Swindon Advertiser reports that Britpop pioneers Oasis, which was apparently named after the Wiltshire town's Oasis centre, were due to reform and play a homecoming gig.

In an article littered with Oasis puns and lyrics, it quoted one local music producer who said: "A mate of a mate of a mate told me he (frontman Liam Gallagher) loves Swindon and doesn't stop talking about the food at Eggelicious."

Meanwhile, Mumsnet announced its intention to launch a new political party – the MNP – in time to field candidates in several key swing seats in the general election.

It said it plans to abolish all taxes on sanitary products, chocolate and gin.

BBC Radio 4's flagship Today programme carried an item about plans to make football goals six inches higher and wider.

In another apparent April fool, blogger Guido Fawkes today announced his decision to run for Parliament.

The Independent ran a story joking that The University of Leicester is set to change it’s name to commemorate Richard III.

The Radio Times gently mocked presenters Ant and Dec, who it claimed were set for a line-up change: “Britain's favourite hosting duo will become a trio known as 'Ant and Dec and Anton Du Beke”

Pink News said that Nick Clegg had joined dating site Grindr in an attempt to “reach out to gay members of the public across the UK” before the general election.

The Daily Mail reported that visitors to Longleat safari park are to be given the option of wrapping their cars in bubble wrap to save them from the attentions of monkeys.

Horse and Hound had fun imagining what an edition guest-edited by Hugh Grant would look like.

Email pged@pressgazette.co.uk to point out mistakes, provide story tips or send in a letter for publication on our "Letters Page" blog

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